Today was frustrating. Okay maybe not across the board--I was able to get a bunch of laundry washed, folded and put away. I read a little bit in a great book I recently started. I even read some great things in Psalms and Proverbs. And got a few emails written.
But...one of my kids is basically on my (frayed) nerves. Said individual's attitude, in particular, has been bugging me lately. Today this little person refused to stay in bed during naptime and just doesn't seem to "get it." They even had the nerve to say they DIDN'T get out of bed, when I'd just caught them moments before. (Remember I said they don't seem to get it???)
During times like these I start getting paranoid, begin questioning all my parenting techniques (like I have so many), and about a million other things. Does this child have a hard heart? Will they learn to obey God? Why does their attitude stink? (I never said I wasn't neurotic!)
Trusting the Lord is hard in general...and extra hard when it comes to my kids. At the end of the day, as much as I seek to know and understand my children, only God can truly know their hearts, and their dreams, and their past hurts, and the content of their souls. He has made me their mother and wants me to train them in the way that they should go, but ultimately, He knows.
Which is good, because clearly I do not.
(Also good is that in about two hours I'm meeting some girlfriends for dinner. And I may just go all out and have a drink too!)