When Kevin and I began dating, it was really more of courtship. We began spending time together with the express intention to see if we would marry. It was purposeful. I was just barely 19, and Kevin was 20.
Not two weeks into said courtship, (unbenownst to me) Kevin told one of his good friends that he wanted to marry me. Guess it didn't take him too long to figure that one out. :)
I knew pretty early on too. I never really saw us breaking up. Because I knew I'd found a catch, I knew we had similar life goals and values, and I knew that unless something strange happened, we'd end up together.
And yet as serious as all of that sounds, we kept things casual. We'd agreed at the outset, for example, that we would not spend any time talking or dreaming about marriage together before we were engaged. We'd also agreed not to say "I love you" outside of engagement, because we believed love was a virtue that means something, and that ought to be backed up with commitment. We also really didn't refer to each other as boyfriend or girlfriend, because we felt that dating is not an institution, and it just seemed obnoxious and oh-so-much-like-high-school.
Then one day, eleven months into our courtship, Kevin told me he wanted to take me on a special date to commemorate courting for "almost a year." I was excited about the special date--but thought it was funny because we had always joked about the cheesy unmarried couples who celebrated "dating anniversaries." (If that was you, sorry. I'm sure you're a lovely person.)
The odd thing was, he'd just returned from being out of town for two weeks and the week leading up to our big date, he was awfully busy "preparing". I kept wondering why he was so busy, especially after being away for so long. I'd missed him and wanted to hang out!
Our date was to be on a Sunday afternoon. And Kevin said he wasn't going to be able to be at church that morning because he was getting things ready.
Kevin NEVER misses church. Ever. Ever, ever, ever. Hmmmmm.
So that afternoon, he picked me up from my apartment, and we drove out to a beautiful, empty beach in Cambria. We sat there on the sand overlooking the ocean, and he began reading something he'd written to me about how great it's been getting to know me and the like.
At that point he dug out of the sand(!) an envelope, with more sweet things he'd written.
And I thought my GOODNESS, he's been out here (and back, and back again) already today burying things??!! It's nearly an hour-long drive from where he lives! This must be a big deal!
Then another envelope, and another. All these beautiful things about how wonderful I am, how much he has come to care about me, etc. Each letter had a different theme.
Finally he stood up, pulled me to my feet, looked into my eyes and told me he loved me.For the first time. And then right next to the ocean he got down on one knee, pulled out of his pocket the most beautiful diamond ring I'd ever seen, and said "Brianna Danielle Perruzzi, I'd be honored if you would be my wife. Will you marry me?"
I was shocked. Stunned. I kept screeching "Are you serious? Are you serious??!!"...and of course said yes. He put the ring on my finger. And I couldn't stop looking at it.
He'd brought his backpack along that day, which contained some sparkling cider and two champagne glasses, along with roses. He'd also brought his guitar, and pulled it out and sang the prettiest, most amazing song that he'd written to me about spending our lives together.
After a wonderful afternoon of celebrating, we headed back to SLO to tell everyone our most exciting news!
And it turns out his busy week of preparations had involved picking up my ring, writing the letters, and driving the 45 minutes to meet my parents for dinner, to ask for my hand in marriage. I told you he was a catch!
And nine months after getting engaged, we wed. Yes, at a Baptist church--and this is funny because we aren't Baptists, and never attended that church. See the reason we couldn't get married at OUR church is a long, stupid story that actually has nothing to do with us, and everything to do with ridiculous church politics, and general cattiness towards the former pastor who was going to officiate. So we took our business elsewhere and he performed the ceremony at a random local Baptist church. Whatevs. I'm now going to go take a deep breath and use some calming techniques as I've dredged up an old injustice that still makes me mad. :)
I was 20 and Kevin was 21 on our wedding day. Best day of my life, aside from the days I birthed or adopted my children. Our engagement in many ways was a lot of fun, and I can remember sitting at work (where I was an office manager for a state legislator) just staring and staring at the ring on my finger, the ring Kevin had saved and saved for. I loved every moment of planning my wedding, I loved dreaming about our future, and about what our marriage would be like. We truly believed God brought us together and hoped to honor Him with our lives and marriage. I also may or may not have done a fair amount of wedding planning while at work. So thank you to the State of California for paying me to pick out wedding favors. :)
Nearly nine years in and I can say without a doubt that we made the right decision. Marriage isn't always easy, because life isn't always easy, but we are so much closer now than we were the day of Kevin's proposal. And while we've changed a bit since then, we've changed together. Side by side. I look back on our engagement day and I think one of the big reasons it was so special was because our courtship was special, because we'd set out with a purpose and it was such an amazing way to honor our relationship and begin our commitment to one another.
So that's us, and our rockin' proposal. Do you have a fun (or amusing) proposal story? Let's hear it!
I'm a Catholic mama to eight kids ages 9 and under, and wife to one great guy. I'm a lover of Jesus, great books, ethnic food, and thrifting. I am pro-life and pro-adoption. Loving Denver. Missing California. Most days are a whirlwind of babies and sweeping and joy in the little things. In spite of good intentions, I am rarely anywhere on time. Here you can follow my journey to just show up and be present in each and every crumb-filled moment.