Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Stuff that makes you think

Today Erin posted this on her blog. Totally worth reading if you're thinking about adopting, or even if you're not, read it anyway. I found it convicting, and hard, and ultimately, very true:


I have several "used-to-be-blog-but-now-are-real-life" friends with kids from Ethiopia. Something that used to always feel like a novelty, like having children who come from a seemingly distant continent on the other side of the world, now just seems very "normal". I also know families (some online, some in real life) with children who have HIV. So even the idea of someday adopting a child with a special medical need doesn't seem so unique anymore.

And what does it mean to be a family, anyway? What is God's purpose for men and women and how do you or I fit into it?

God's been changing my answers to those questions ever since my first child was born. Sometimes slow and subtle, but sometimes sudden, and seemingly without warning. I think I'm in that place now where, if you ask me how many kids I "want", I just plain don't have an answer. As many as God wants us to have, I suppose. (I know, I know, that's kind of a vague answer.) We don't actively prevent pregnancy, and there are so many children who go to their cold metal beds every night praying for something that most of us take for granted: a mom and a dad, someone to love them.

On Sunday at church, I was so convicted and encouraged and inspired by a sermon that, among other things, talked about no one truly wanting to be converted...we look for churches or groups that fit the way WE look at life, and don't leave room for God to change our hearts and ultimately convert us. That was pretty mind-blowing for me. It can be scary to have God take you places you never thought you'd go. Do I really WANT to be changed? Do I really WANT to let go of what's safe, comfortable and "typical" to follow after Jesus? I love John Piper's idea of not wasting your life. But I doubt that it is ever easy. Or always accepted by others.

Lots of thoughts swirling around in my head. On a side-note, do you know that this has now been the longest we have gone without adding a child to our family, either through birth or adoption, since we've been married??? Weird. I'm not pregnant, and we're not starting the adoption process again yet or anything--but I find myself looking forward to both! In spite of the fact that the six of us are living in 1500 square feet of space right now, still completely unsettled. Like I said, God continues to re-shape my vision of family, and life. And that's a good thing!


joy said...

wow-the part regarding how we find churches that fit the way we look at life is very convicting. how true is that. this was kind of a scary post--not scary like there-are-vampires-coming-to-get-you scary (sorry, things are vampire-related in my life just now :)
but scary because it's true and scary because I think I don't really want to be changed. I'd love for God to change some people around me and maybe change some circumstances, but as for really changing me, that's a whole new level. if i'm honest, that's not something i pray wholeheartedly about. hmmmm... food for thought.

shell said...

Thanks for sharing what it on your heart. I know it has been weird we have gone two years without a -job change, birth, adoption or move. Very strange!

Hauswife said...

You're speaking my heart here, Brianna. Wow, thanks for this.

Kristen Borland said...

our hands are pretty full right now too, but even with expecting number three, i'm still totally anxious and excited to adopt. i guess when you have a passion it doesn't just go away when things are busy.

by the way, i'm so loving how involved you are getting in AHOPE and really advocating for these wonderful children. it's neat to see how God is using your passions.

Amy Jo said...

What a great post. I can totally relate on so many levels. Thanks for sharing your heart. You have a beautiful family! Sweet blessings, Amy in OR


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